Since leaving BYU, life is a little crazy working all day all week (with my six jobs) then sleeping Saturday and church all day Sunday. With farewells and everything else going on, I don't have much time to do anything but family outside of work. This summer being with my family I realize how much I take advantage of them and how much they mean to me. Garrett no matter what always makes me feel loved and shows me that the little things don't matter. Kristen teaches me patience... with our age it is not always the easiest for me to handle her, but I still love her to death. Nathan on the other hand is there to go on car rides blasting the music as loud as possible and still manages to put up with me when I beat him up (just trying to toughen him up). My mom is so amazing. words cant even describe how much I love her and what she does for me. we talk and talk and talk about everything! She listens and gives the best advice. My dad is my best friend. I have always been a daddy's girl and he still teases me as if I was seven years old and manages to still pull out the same laugh I had when I was little. When I'm feeling alone or depressed he just looks at me, gives me a hug and tells me he loves me, of course i then bawl like a baby, but I love him so much. Family means the world to me.
When I am away from them I had my BYU family. Being away from them now, I realized how much I love my college friends and how grateful I am for each of them and for the impact each and every one of them have on my life. I miss Maddy always asking me whats wrong and making sure I am okay. I miss my late night talks with Alli about life and the bigger picture. I miss stuffing my face with Sarah, not sleeping and being completely crazy and so loud, and not caring about what not anyone thinks about how drunk or lesbainish we act. I miss Lauren and our deep talks late at night up in the mountains. I miss Olivia and just everything about her, how she makes me cry from laughing so hard and of course sleeping with her, or anyone for that matter. (I realized that I hate sleeping alone...) I miss Rebecca's Cooking, Heidi's sweet spirit and how happy she always is, I miss Kathryn and how easy going she is and how she just lets me vent, I miss Jett and how she would laugh at everything! and that is just the girls... I miss all the guys too but they wouldn't see this for two years because Cole and Kurtis are the only ones left. My freshman year has changed my life, changed who I am for the better and I will never forget all the memories I created. Being away from all of it makes me miss it even more.
I LOVE BYU and can't wait to go down there in the fall again and make new memories, but not replace the old ones, just add to them. Working keeps me busy and helps the time go by fast. Crazy to think that I am turning 19, and then June will be over, then we are half way with waiting and there are only two more months til my life is a little more complete down in Provo.
Life may not always go the way I expect it to, or even want it to. With boys leaving left and right on their missions, either ones I have dated or ones that are friends, it is always sad to see them go knowing I won't see them for a long time, and I could possibly be married when they get back. But I have learned to not look for the future wishing away the days that I do have, because time flies by and life is unexpected. As long as I enjoy each day making each day count then that is how I will be truly happy and enjoy my summer away from my best friends and saying goodbye.